Jaguar XF Sportbrake is a clever and cool estate

FISHING, camping, horse-riding and skiing. All things I imagine the Jag set love getting up to, but until now they've never really had the car to cope.

If you wanted a finely sculpted, thoroughly British way of lugging your lifestyle equipment from the gymkhana to the ski resort you've only really had two options; a Range Rover or a Discovery. That's why I reckon Jaguar's onto a winner with something they should have come up with ages ago, in the form of an XF estate.

It gets off to a great start in my books simply because it's got a cool name - it is, ladies and gentlemen, the XF Sportbrake, which it makes it sound like an aerodynamic aid you'd fit to your snowmobile or mountain bike. I know it's a sort of unspoken rule among the executive car club never to call your estate an estate, but somehow Sportbrake has just got a bit more oomph than Avant or Touring does.

Jaguar, who are revealing the XF Sportbrake at this year's Geneva Motorshow, said:

"Sharing its underpinnings with the XF saloon, the Sportbrake's overall length grows by just 5mm, its weight by less 70kg and its chassis structure matches the strength of the conventional XF. These characteristics mean the Sportbrake can closely match the acclaimed handling of the XF saloon yet offers a large and highly practical load space.

"Every panel on the XF Sportbrake, from the B-Pillar rearwards, is new. The strong silver signature line running the length of the car is extended while the C-Pillar is finished in gloss black, a trait shared with the XJ saloon."

Estate car practicality blended with the firm's refreshingly affordable 2.2 diesel lump should, I reckon, broaden the XF's appeal way beyond the members of your local golf club. Expect to see plenty of them on our roads when the Sportbrake gets launched later this year.

Can you guess this smartly styled saloon?

THE sharply-crafted snout suggests a new BMW. The way the chrome-lipped windows meet the waistline has more than a hint of Lexus. And you’d be forgiven for mistaking that pert rear end for an Audi A5‘s.

But, believe it or not, this new arrival isn’t a BMW, Merc, Audi, Lexus or Jag. Despite having all the hallmarks of the luxury car establishment, this executive car contender comes from rather humbler origins.

It is a Kia.

The K9 - stop sniggering, Doctor Who fans - is the Korean company’s first ever rear-wheel-drive car, and while it’s obvious to see what they’ve been inspired by it also shows just how confident the firm’s become in recent years.

Mr Soon-Nam Lee, Director of Kia’s Overseas Marketing Group, said: “K9 is our first rear-wheel drive sedan, created without compromise in its design, driving performance and new technologies.

“K9 sets a whole new level of standards and values in the large sedan segment, and its design will be another Kia demonstration of our brand’s power to surprise.”

It’s just a shame that while the company’s clearly feeling confident it’s not yet ballsy enough to bring it to us Brits, who are some of the most notoriously brand-obsessed car buyers anywhere in the world. While I’ve no doubt Kia will sell shedloads of K9s in its home markets, how would it perform in a nation where the BMW 3-Series now outsells the Ford Mondeo?


While there aren’t any plans to sell the K9 anywhere in Europe, it does prove one thing. Never let it be said that the Korean car industry can’t come up with a good looking car!

The Range Rover Evoque Convertible - the latest in a long line of open top Land Rovers

LAND ROVER has just raised the stakes when it comes to desirable off-roaders - by lowering the roof on the baby Range Rover Evoque.

The company's just shown off this 'concept' (as in a dead cert for actual production) for an open-top version of the award-winning Evoque, which it reckons is going to carve a new niche by blending open air fun with legendary Land Rover mudplugging ability.

Gerry McGovern, the company's design director, said:

"The Evoque lends itself beautifully to the idea of a convertible. This study is not a traditional convertible design execution - instead we have worked with the balance of the Evoque's lines to retain its distinctive shape and create something that is unique and, we believe, highly desirable."

Except, of course, it's not quite as new a concept as you might think. While it would be the first production Range Rover convertible its creators are more than familiar with chopping the roofs of their other products - the first generation Freelander was available with a fabric roof at the rear, while the traditional, leaf-sprung Land Rovers have been available with canvas roofs going right the way back to the very first Series One in 1948.

It's also true that open-top Range Rovers have been available from aftermarket customisers for donkey's years - if you don't believe me, check out the very slick example you could clock way back in 1983 in the opening scenes of Octopussy.

But that doesn't mean I don't think Jaguar Land Rover's onto a winner with this al-fresco version of the acclaimed Evoque. They say they've got no plans to put into production.

Yet...

Too many motorists miss the point of convertibles

I'D LIKE to argue this week that my ideal world would be a happy-clappy one brimmed with a healthy helping of democracy, but I can't because it wouldn't.

Simister's Britain, of course, would be a brutal but benevolent dictatorship where the great and the good would be made to share their contributions with the rest of society and the less fortunate would be given a helping hand. Most importantly of all, the stupid and annoying would be punished for their various crimes as I saw fit. Particularly those who buy a convertible and then refuse to put the roof down.

On a fine, sunny, spring day yesterday I drove all the way to Manchester and back with the roof down and loved it - but every other car that could have had its canvas or folding-metal roof down didn't. My fellow convertible connoisseurs, in Simister's Britain, would be seen as wasting an opportunity and thus punishable by a lengthy spell in prison given the absolute power I'd inevitably wield. Naturally, said prison would have a retractable roof which opened every time the sun came out, as part of the corrective justice my dictatorship would provide.

Driving a convertible is one of the most enjoyable experiences of motoring - with the wind in your hair, a blue sky rather than a roof lining above your head and the sounds and smells of the great British countryside wafting directly into the cabin, you somehow feel a little bit closer to nature. It's a thrill that harks back to the dawn of motoring - the very first horseless carriages came al fresco - it's something British motorists have long embraced and most importantly of all it's fun. People who refuse to put their roof down when the sky is blue and the sun is shining are missing the point completely.

While the officers working for my secret police force will respect drivers' rights to put their roof up if it's cold, dark, or rainy, the pleasure of driving an open-top car with the roof down on a beautiful day will be mandatory, because otherwise drivers would be defeating the point of owning a Z4/MX-5/TF (or even lowlier ragtops, like the Escort and Astra cabriolets). A ragtop with its roof down would be a proud, powerful symbol of the freedom Simister's Britain would bring its citizens.

All cars are equal, obviously, but some are more equal than others.

Electric Mia gets green light for Government grants

IF YOU liked the little Mia electric van Life On Cars tested a couple of weeks ago then the Governnment have got some good news for you.

The secretary of state for transport confirmed this week that the French-made zero emissions vehicle - which is unusual because it only comes in middle-hand-drive - is eligible for both the ‘Plug-In Car’ and ‘Plug-In Van’ Grants, and confirmed that Mia's offerings meet all the safety, reliability, performance and warranty standards necessary for the UK market.

As a result the standard short wheelbase model (mia-U) will retail at approximately £21,000 and the two extended models, the mia L and the mia box van, will both retail at approximately £22,000.

Last month Life On Cars reported on the Mia's local connection - a Southport man is helping UK companies to test the car for possible fleet use in the future.

Can you solve the MINI Clubvan mystery?

A SOUTHPORT sign writer is to have his work displayed to thousands of people at a prestigious show in Geneva - on the side of a new MINI concept car.

Visitors to this year's Geneva Motorshow will get to see the new MINI Clubvan - a small panel van in the same vein as the original Mini van of the 1960s - on display, which features vehicle graphics on the side which reads “Hugh Buckingham Sign Writer, Southport”, giving the resort worldwide attention after the concept car was announced this week.

MINI UK said in a statement: "The company featured on the MINI Clubvan Concept shown at Geneva ‘Hugh Buckingham Signwriter’ is a UK company, based in Southport which creates similar vehicle graphics for its customers.

"The Concept showcases how these might look on a MINI Clubvan."

However, when pressed by The Champion earlier this week MINI were unable to confirm any further details about the firm, or give any more details as to how the tie-up with the Oxfordshire-based car company came about.

The Champion also tried to track down the sign writing firm to hear more about the promotion its work would get through the MINI Clubvan concept, but despite efforts to track down the company no details could be found before this week's edition went to press.

Are you the Hugh Buckingham whose work is featured on the van? Get in touch with The Champion on 01704 392404 or send an email to david.simister@champnews.com

International MG Show at Stoneleigh Park 2012

IT WAS like being let loose in a toy shop, only with much bigger, MG-shaped toys.

Enthusiasts of everything octagon-badged got sent to Coventry today to check one of the largest MG shows in Europe, with everything from the earliest TA roadsters from the Thirties right through to the modern day ZR, ZS and ZT models well catered for when it came to spares (although, strangely, I didn't see a single MG6 anywhere, and the MG-badged Metros, Maestros and Montegos were notable by the absence).

But by far the best bit was the Stoneleigh Park warehouse a stone's throw from the main hall itself, which were filled, row by row, with hundreds of MGs. Magnettes, RV8 roadsters, ZR hot hatches, ZT-T estates - you name it, someone had brought one to the show, ready for car enthusiasts from across the world to gawp at.

Life On Cars took these pictures at the show:

Chevrolet to offer cool Camaro to UK customers

AVEO, Captive, Cruze and Orlando. The names of these Chevrolets - now a familar sight on Britain's roads - aren't exactly evocative of the company's American heritage.

Things, however, are about to change if you mosey on down to your nearest Chevrolet showroom, after the company confirmed that UK buyers will now be able to buy officially-imported versions of the current Camaro for the first time.

Chevrolet UK, which can draw its origins back to the rather humbler roots of Daewoo's former operations in this country, is excited about having a model which can draw more directly on Chevy's all-American heritage in its showrooms.

A spokesperson for the company said this week: “There ain’t no muscle like Detroit muscle, and British fans of the iconic cars that ruled American roads throughout the 1960s can now place orders for the modern incarnation of one of the greatest muscle cars of all time – the Chevrolet Camaro.

”Priced at £34,995 for the Coupe or £39,995 for the soft-top Convertible model, the new Camaro exudes all of the attributes that made the original muscle cars famous – great performance, stunning looks and incredible value for money.“

The Camaro is one of America's best known muscle car brands, and trace its roots back to the mid 1960s when General Motors decided to take on Ford's all-conquering Mustang in a bid to bring younger buyers into its showrooms. Although the car's now something of an institution in the States, Brit buyers have long been denied the Camaro and the faster Corvette sports cars.

General Motors did import a small number of the previous generation Camaro into the UK in the 1990s, but despite its competitive price and ample power it failed to attract large numbers of buyers, but that was before Chevrolet established itself as a brand in its own right in this country and before the current, retro-styled generation arrived.

If you're up for an all-American muscle car which thumps out 432bhp from a 6.2 litre V8 - they don't do political correctness in the States - get yourself down to Chevrolet's showrooms in the spring.

The Morgan Threewheeler is just a little bit mad. That's why I love it

IT'S a little bit like walking through Liverpool One on a busy Christmas Eve naked. Or at least, that's what I imagine it's like.

That's the thing with the Morgan Threewheeler, because you're cold, you're exposed and - although you wouldn't want to admit it - just a little bit liberated. Oh, and absolutely everybody, for miles around, will be looking at you. Jaws drop to the floor. Morgan's latest motor is marvellous for all sorts of reasons, but it's emphatically not a car for anyone who's a bit self-conscious.

The photoshoot Champion photographer Martyn Snape and I did with the Moggy last week for our sister magazine GR8Life was a nightmare, because the Threewheeler's got the same crowd-pulling punch as anything Ferrari or Lamborghini make. In fact I'd argue it's got more, because a Ferrari is at least vaguely familiar whereas a three-wheeled vintage sports car with no roof, no doors and no windscreen isn't. Every time we got the shot set up, someone would wander over with a smartphone and start snapping away themselves.

A leather-clad biker in his middle ages asked us how many numbers on that week's Euromillions he'd need to afford one. Two rotund ladies jokingly offered to pose on the bonnets, Page Three style. A talkative toddler demanded that his equally curious dad found out what this strangely styled car was.

All this from a small sports car that hadn't even been started up.

When you do you realise it makes a bizarrely brilliant contribution to road safety - the S&S motorbike engine, mounted right at the front, is so loud that no pedestrian anywhere could possiby argue “Oh, I never heard it coming”. It is so intoxicatingly and defiantly loud that I have no idea how it got passed by the EU noise boffins in Brussels, but I'm glad it did.

It's not really a car in any conventional sense but a sort of automotive adventure in which you're always the lead actor, playing the role of a plucky British action hero who spends his days bumbling noisily down the country lanes to solve crimes committed at quaint country pubs. Naturally, said hero can't help being a bit of a showoff.

What's it like to drive a £30,000 three-wheeled sports car which looks a bit like a cross between a Blower Bentley and First World War fighter plane? Tune in next week when it gets the full Life On Cars road test treatment...

I couldn't agree more with traffic calming, but are speed bumps really the answer?

I KNOW it's a victory for safety but it's a crashing defeat for my suspension and - by proxy - my spine. The council has ruined one of my favourite roads.

If, like me, you ever travel between Churchtown and Crossens you'll know what I'm on about. Where once there was smooth tarmac there are now rows of humps, right the way between these two charming parts of Southport, and they haven't succeeded in slowing me down. They've made me stop using it altogether.

“A-ha!” I can hear the council's road safety boffins retort in response, Alan Partridge style. Where once souped-up Saxos and Corsas screamed along this stretch of road they're now having to brake before each and every bump; that or face the prospect of either breaking their backs or damaging their shock absorbers. I'm sure, in a year's time, the stats will show the council's mission of reducing the speeds along Bankfield Lane and Rufford Road will have been easily accomplished.

Don't think for a moment that I'm demanding the right to drive down it like a man who's late for the birth of his first child - I couldn't agree more with the need to slow people down along some roads (and everybody's got at least one in mind). There are, for instance, far too many single track roads I know which you can legally do 60mph on, but to even attempt it would be insane. 30mph too fast for Bankfield Lane? Yep, at quite a few times of day I'd go along with that.


Bankfield Lane is one of my favourite roads for a very simple reason - more often that not, it connects where I live with where I want to go. I know that plenty of motorists took the mickey a bit with it, and on some tragic occasions with fatal results. As a motorist I loved it, but as a Crossens chap I couldn't agree more something needed to be done to slow people down.

But did it really need an endless series of enormous speed humps to cure the problem? Couldn't chicanes have done the trick? Or lowering the speed limit? Or even - and I know this is dangerously avantgarde thinking - road safety cameras? I have a particular hatred reserved for speed bumps because while they slow down the dangerous minority (who'll only find a different road to strut their stuff on anyway), it's the majority of motorists who have to pay the price of the additional wear and tear.

The irony is that it's those who live locally - the ones who called for traffic calming in the first place - who'll suffer the most.

The Life On Cars Valentine's Day Spectacular

I HOPE my girlfriend isn't reading. With it being Valentine's Day it's probably appropriate to get it over with. I love my cars.

Or rather, I love a lot things about cars, and motoring, and the people and the culture and the good times I associate with them.

For instance, I love the feeling of the wind in my hair when I'm bumbling along in a small, properly sorted sports car. I love the rumble my MG makes when it first starts up on a cold morning. I love the timeless lines of the Jaguar E-Type, and the perfect proportions of the Austin Healey 100. I love the the ripples in the Peugeot RCZ's roof and the Tardis-like packaging of the Toyota IQ.

I love the fact that Britain's luxury car companies are coming up with their best offerings in years and that - thanks largely to the Chinese market - they can't build them fast enough. I love the feeling of being awestruck and apprehensive in equal measure whenever I'm tackling the Buttertubs Pass in North Yorkshire. I love knowing why Suzuki's Swift Sport is one of the best hot hatches created in the last decade. I love the sublimely quick and precise steering you only seem to get in an original Mini. I also love - for reasons I completely failed to get across in a Champion column last week - old, rugged, off-roaders.

I love, for reasons I've never been entirely sure of, the Triumph Stag. I love the feeling of having a day to yourself and a wonderful set of wheels to drive. I love the winding B-roads of North Wales and the Lake District. I love the way the Saab 9-5 is perfect for the motorway, and I love the way the Lotus Elise emphatically isn't.

I love taking classic cars I probably can't afford to pubs in the West Lancashire countryside, to have rambling conversations with other people who also own classic cars they can't afford. I love going to shows across the north west and telling interested passers-by why I've brought what I've brought. I love telling anally pedantic, wannabe concours judges who come over to point out a bit of bodywork I've missed polishing exactly where to go. I love looking at old cars, finding out about their place in history, and learning more about them.

Most of all, I love writing about them and I love sharing your stories from the world of motoring. Glad to be of service...

Fire up the... Kia Rio

I DON'T know if there's an award out there somewhere for Most Improved Car Maker but surely Kia must be in the running for it.

You can snigger all you like but I reckon that owners of the Korean company's cars can now join their Skoda-driving counterparts in switching their smiles to smug mode, because they're having the last laugh nowadays. Generous warranties and aggressive pricing are always going to count in a car's favour, but thanks to the massive strides the company's made with the likes of the pretty Picanto, the Top Gear-starring Cee'd and the strikingly styled Soul, it's increasingly closing the gap on its European rivals.

But if ever there was a dint in the company's armour it was the Rio, which despite its keen pricing never quite excited UK buyers enough to take on the Fiesta/Polo/Clio establishment. That's why the Koreans have gone to town with this third generation model, which on aesthetics alone is a huge improvement on its two lacklustre predecessors.

Slickly styled with plenty of neat detailing, the new Rio is much more like it it, pulling off the trick of looking slick and sophisticated without making its five door package difficult to access. The days of new Kias arriving in the showroom with black plastic bumpers and awkwardly proportioned angles, thankfully, are long gone.

It's just a shame that the interior still lets the side down; yes, it's very spacious and well equipped, but the actual quality of the plastics and the switchgear involved still give the impression of being made to a price, and not a particularly high one at that.

Nor is the Rio the most exciting car in the handling or performance stakes but nor will it ever let you down either, with handling that's reassuring rather than race car exciting and a ride and steering feedback that's smooth rather than jerkily informative.

On its own terms the Rio doesn't quite topple the Fiesta off its perch but it's an intruiging alternative, but that's before you factor in the seven year warranty and the price (the Rio starts at a shade under ten grand). Once you do the prospect of a Kia and cash in your pocket becomes a very tempting alternative.

So much so you'll be laughing all the way to the bank...

Start 'em young....

THE young car nut I met earlier this morning took a particularly keen interest in my choice of wheels.

A woman got talking to this morning with a bit of a history of working in the motor industry - she now works for Isuzu, and can count stints with TVR and Multipart among her previous jobs - introduced me to her son, who was obviously keen to follow in the family footsteps and develop a passion for cars and motoring.

He took a look out at the window, clocked the little blue sports car I'd arrived in, and started with the obvious question.

"What is your car?"

"It's a Mazda" I replied. "A Mazda MX-5."

His eyes lit up with excitement. "Wow!" he commented gleefully. "An MX-5!"

I was, to be honest, flattered that a fellow petrolhead approved of my taste in small, affordable, rear-wheel-drive roadsters, so I decided to return the compliment by asking him the question I always get asked. What, I wondered, was his favourite car?

He paused for a moment and smiled. "BMW".

"Which BMW?" I asked.

"The yellow and black one!"

I wasn't expecting that one. Unless Munich's most famous motor maker has announced a collaboration with JCB or has a wasp-inspired new racing livery, I wasn't aware of any BMWs which are particularly famous for being yellow and black.

Not that I minded, though. The car enthusiast in question was three years old after all...

Prepare to fire up the... Honda NSX

A SUCCESSOR to one of the most influential - and overlooked - supercars of all time is being considered by the company which first created it more than 20 years ago.

Few companies back in the early Nineties could boast that their fastest offering had been developed by the late Formula One ace Ayrton Senna or boast then-revolutionary construction and engine technology, so it's incredible to think the Honda NSX wasn't more of a hit. However, now that the world is cottoning onto the original's classic-in-waiting status prices for the original are soaring, and Honda itself is keen to cash in on the car's cult following by launching a long-awaited successor.

Yet that's exactly what Honda will be showing off at next month's Geneva Motorshow and if - or, more likely when - it generates enough interest the Japanese automotive giant is likely to get cracking on a production version, which is likely to show off the hybrid technology it's already used to good effect in the Insight and CR-Z among others.

Honda president Takanobu Ito said when he unveiled an Acura-badged version to American enthusiasts last month:

"Like the first NSX, we will again express high performance through engineering efficiency.

"In this new era, even as we focus on the fun to drive spirit of the NSX, I think a supercar must respond positively to environmental responsibilities."

Like the original, the new NSX will have its rear wheels powered by a mid-mounted V6 engine, but it'll use not just hybrid technology but also direct injection to make the most of every drop of fuel. It'll also use a dual clutch transmission with built-in electric motor, to create supercar acceleration while offering outstanding efficiency.

In fact, the biggest problem will be overcoming the brand snobbery which dogged the original, because the NSX will up against the prestige offered by the likes of Porsche, Lotus and even Ferrari.

Can lightning strike twice? With all the technology on offer with the new NSX, you'd hope not for Honda's sake.

West Lancashire pub to host military vehicle weekend

MILITARY machines from as far back as the Second World War will invade West Lancashire this spring for a major public display.

The event is being hosted by Heatons Bridge Inn, near Scarisbrick, on the weekend of April 14 and 15, with enthusiasts from as far afield as Cumbria bringing machines to display on a field behind the pub.

Steve Flitcroft, secretary of the South Cumbria and North Lancashire Military Vehicle Trust, which is organising the event, said: “At other events in other parts of the region we see a lot of people turning up to take at look at the military vehicles because they generate quite a lot of interest.

"We are the largest military vehicle trust in the UK and Europe, with vehicles going back as far as the First World War, so we're hoping that over the weekend we'll be able to show off quite a good cross section of military vehicles from conflicts going right up to the present day."

Although the exact details of the displays included in the event have yet to be confirmed, the public can expect to see vehicles Willys Jeeps, Ferret armoured cars, Saracen personnel carriers and larger ex-military machines.

The club will incorporate a second world war pillbox, which still stands near to the pub, into their display.

Steve Winrow, manager of the Heatons Bridge Inn, told Life On Cars he was looking forward to seeing the event taking place in April and to seeing the variety of vehicles expected to attend.

"It's not something we've ever done before, but a couple of the trust's members approached us and asked if the big field at the back, and the pillbox, could be used to host the weekend show.

"I'm really looking forward to it - it should be a brilliant event which will offer the people of West Lancashire something a bit different."

The event, which will also include a road run, takes place throughout the day on April 14 and 15 at the pub, situated on Heatons Bridge Road. For more information contact Mark on 01704 545514.

Fire up the... Honda Civic

SPOT the difference is a game I've never been especially good at, but it's one you'll be invited to play the first time you get a glimpse of this accomplished new Honda.

Give the new Civic the most casual of looks and - without wanting to be cruel - you'll be wondering whether the company's been spending its money on photocopiers rather than car designers. It does, if you're not paying attention and one passes you in the street, look almost identical to the outgoing model.

But there's some clever thinking behind the evolutionary rather than revolutionary styling. It seems you, The Great British Public, loved the looks of the old one but got a bit hot under the collar about a couple of niggles. The spoiler cutting right across the rear window, for instance. Or the slightly weird and very glassy rear lights. Or the fact you banged your head as you got in the back. That's why the new one's seems the same despite being compellingly different on closer inspection.

Admittedly it's business as usual at the back window because the spolier still cuts across it, but now at least it doesn't obscur the rear view so much it annoys you. The rear lights are a lot more conventional and straightforward, and anyone hoping to get out of the back has got some good news. Your scalp will emerge unscathed!

The new Civic isn't as much fun to drive as Ford's Focus or as achingly attractive as Alfa's Giulietta but goes for your head instead of your heart. It isn't the life and soul of the party but with its roomy and beautifully built interior, its punchy diesel powerplant and its intuitively easy controls, it's definitely the brains behind it.

So it's a single step back and about five steps forward for Honda. The new Civic is a little but duller, but an awful lot better.

Why everybody (still) loves a Land Rover

"OFF-ROADERS are stupid and pointless," a friend suggested as we shot along the M6 somewhere near Stafford a fortnight ago. "You just don't need them."

All you need in an everyday car, he reckoned, is something cheap, comfortable, easy to look after and equipped with a healthy bit of oomph. Something, he reckoned, that's a lot like his turbodiesel Citroen Xsara. Anything with four wheel drive or knobbly tyres is just unecessary and expensive.

Seeing said mate utilise this argument - and win - hurt because I've always had a soft spot for 4x4s, and I don't mean the blinged-up, over-imposing "lifestyle" efforts from BMW and Audi either. I mean the off-roaders of the old school, the Jeeps, Isuzus and Shoguns with their unpretentious styling and obligatory Ifor Williams trailers. I especially like Land Rovers, particularly the proper ones which look like they've been styled on an Etch-a-Sketch. But having a soft spot wasn't winning an argument in the mildest winter we've seen in years.

Lukily, I found the answer I was looking for last weekend, when I ventured beyond my usual stomping ground into a place best known as The Countryside. There, there are hills and rivers and windy little lanes made muddy by the near-constant flow of tractors among them. Out there almost every house has a proper off-roader parked outside it, and when it suddenly started snowing I realised why.

After just a few hours The Countryside was no longer green and pleasant; it was like being trapped inside a Christmas card, only with more BBC Look North crews telling you off over the airwaves because you forgot to pack Ray Mears and a shovel into the boot. Naturally, I'd forgotten to bother with either.


With seven inches of the slippery white stuff to tackle my trusty old Rover did alright but I still wished it'd had the word "Land" in front of its name. Certainly, any Land Rover would have been better than the 11-reg SEAT Leon half a dozen of us had to push out of trouble, or the MINI Cooper which struggled to get over a humpback bridge without spinning its wheels, or the BMW 1-Series at the side of the A591 next to a driver who'd just given up trying.

On this cold, slippery, unforgiving day in The Countryside, nobody wanted the Porsches or BMWs the tourists had brought into the village the night before. But absolutely everybody wanted the 25-year-old Range Rover which was darting around the village completely unaffected. Like the local council's rather scabbier Defenders it was untroubled by the conditions, but it also exuded class in a way a brand-new X5 doesn't.

So off-roaders - proper ones at least - aren't stupid and pointless. Just ask anyone who lives in The Countryside.

Is the writing on the wall for troubled Saab?

I BEGIN this week not with an intro, but a disturbing statistic. In December 2011 just eight of you treated yourselves to a brand new Saab.

That's not just the figure for a particular showroom or part of the north west, but for the whole of the country. I've refrained from writing too much about Saab's slow and painful demise until now because the story's a bit too soap opera even for this column, but unless a miracle of Lazarus proportions heads their way it's safe to say the Swedish firm is another motoring name consigned to the history books.

Which is a shame, because Saab made some cracking cars right up until their final dying moments, even if they did knock a few stinkers out along the way. They were a firm renowned for sticking their fingers up at the motoring establishment and insisting on doing things differently. Even when it annoyed the hell out of General Motors, their very boring and very American former owners.

How else do you explain efforts like the fabulous 99 Turbo, a quirky saloon renowned for its mid-range punch? Or that middle class icon, the original 900 Cabriolet? Admittedly, they weren't cars modelled on jet fighters (despite what the ads would have you believe) but nor were they automotive flotsam created by committees either.

My own favourites are the two generations of the 9-5, which disguised their humble Vauxhall origins to offer up their owners a masterclass in comfort and refinement.

Their killer problem was that 99% of the potential buyers decided they'd still rather have the BMW 5-Series instead, leaving the Saab to survive solely on its “at least it's not a BMW” appeal.

Saab could and should have flourished once it passed into independent ownership, but GM's insistence that nobody should have access to its technology has ruined any chances the Swedes had. There are all sorts of complicated reasons why the firm's Dutch owners have gone bust, but a big part of it was that General Motors vetoed any ideas of Beijing's car makers coming to the rescue in case the Detroit-funded tech underpinning today's Saabs fell victim to a bit of a Chinese takeaway.

Ford happily lets Indian-owned Jaguar use its technological know-how, and BMW grants MG's Chinese custodians the same privelige, but the idea of a Chinese firm getting GM's inside info via Saab just proved too much for the Americans.

Unless Saab is treated to a miracle which brings its UK sales above eight a month, I think the writing's on the wall.

Life On Cars has just enjoyed its best month ever, with the site being viewed more than 3,500 times in January! I'd like to say a big thank you to everyone who reads and enyoys this site and the column in The Champion (published each Wednesday).

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